So yesterday was Emmy's four-month birthday, which she celebrated by sitting and watching the early soccer game with me. Kami walked in and I was sitting on the couch, feet crossed. Emsley was leaning back on me, watching the game, feet crossed. Then she showed her delight at the wonderful game of soccer by backheeling me square in the home fries. Emsley, not Kami.
Things are going great. We all survived October, which used to be our favorite month of the year (fall, MLB playoffs, football, etc.). Now it's just a month I try to get through without getting pneumonia - something I was unable to achieve in 2010 and 2011. I do ghost tours at The Hermitage, and they're a lot of fun, but it's also the second-busiest month of the year in terms of my regular job responsibilities. So there are a lot of 14- and 16-hour days in October. It was hard going a month without seeing Kami, but adding Emmy to the list of people I don't see was brutal - but it's worth it to pick up the extra vacation time.
Anyhow, while I was at work, Kami was a single mom. I'd leave most days by 7:30am, come back home about 5pm, take Gunther and Angus out, kiss Kami and Emsley, and go back to work for a 7:00pm tour, and get home about 9:30. But enough about me, eh?
Emsley's doing great. She had her four-month shots today. Shots don't go so well...for Kami. She can't watch. Emsley does fairly well. The first shots are like "Hey..." and then the second shots are like she goes "HEY!" and she cries for a little bit. It's worse for us because she really only cries when she's exhausted or is sitting in poo - but the nurses say she does great.
If you recall, Emsley was 9lbs 7ozs when she was born, which put her in the Gigantor percentile. She's now just over 14lbs, so her weight and her height has evened out. Also, the four-month mark means that we have been given the All Clear to start her on rice cereal. Off we went to the store to buy little bowls and little spoons and rice cereal. Well, of course we picked the all natural, not genetically modified (which, let's just remark on how hard it is to find things - for adults, as well - that aren't genetically modified. I'll take baseball players who are genetically modified, but not food, thank you very much.) rice cereal.
Emsley was fussy all day, sore from the shots, and tired from waking up super early because DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME IS RIDICULOUS. She still hasn't been able to get back on her overnight sleeping schedule since the anachronistic abomination went into effect last weekend. Emsley used to sleep until between 7:00-8:00am. Now we're lucky if she makes it past 6:00am. Benjamin Franklin owes us, owes us all, that hour back.
Anyhow, the first go at rice cereal didn't end up going so well. We put her in her Bumbo on the table - which I know you're not supposed to do, but it's not like we put her up there and then went out for a drink. I stood right next to her the whole time. We mixed up the cereal in her little purple bowl -
- Which, hang on, because this deserves a separate section. I am woefully lacking in basic math skills. You could make a decent argument that I am woefully lacking in basic logic - I once failed Basic Motor Skills in driver's ed six times because I couldn't figure out if the car on the page was my car, or the car in front of me. So the first few times I made Emmy's formula, it took me about 30 minutes to write the equation out. And by "equation" I mean "1 scoop of formula + 2 ounces of water = :-)" Now I know it by heart, but that basic conversion was like asking me to memorize the periodic table.
Anyhow, the instructions on the rice cereal box were very short, as if they planned on the dad preparing it to be able to understand instructions. (I might as well be the mouth-breather who goes about daily tasks watching other people to see if they look at me like I just threw up down my shirt, just to make sure I'm doing them right. I do this while I pay at the pump at the gas station. I wish I was kidding.) The instructions said, "Add one tablespoon of cereal to 3-4 tablespoons of formula. Add water to desired consistency." That was it. So I stood in the kitchen thinking:
1) I don't know how many tablespoons are in the scoop that comes in the formula can.
2) How do I figure that out?
3) What do I put it in once it's measured out?
4) How much water do I add?
5) What water consistency do I desire?
6) How many tablespoons are in an ounce?
*At this point, I pulled out garlic powder and set it next to the bowl. For what reason, I have no idea.*
7) What's the ratio of cereal to formula?
8) How much water do I add?
9) What do I put it in?
Ultimately, with Kami's help - and Kami has the patience of a saint - I figured it out. Kami knew how to do it all along, but NOBODY WAS HELPING ME ACCOMPLISH THIS TASK. I won't be able to replicate the results tomorrow, but I got it tonight.
Emsley liked it well enough. She didn't gobble down a bowl of genetically righteous gruel, but took a few bites and didn't Exorcist-Vomit it up. We chalked it up to not feeling well. And Benjamin Franklin.
